The Art Of Ice Water – For Bonehead Waiters

Water Glass Nice
What I Want

I love ice water. I love it crazy cold. I love my glass of ice water to be perspiring, and I love the glass to be almost too cold to hold. I love the glass tall and full of ice. When I stick my beak into the glass to drink, I like the ice to be so jam packed in that tilting the glass back to drink often causes wet, cold ice to touch parts of my nose, mouth and even sometime’s my eyes. I love sucking on the melting ice after the water is gone, and I love feeling the cubes get a rough surface as they melt in my mouth. When I go into a restaurant and ask for water, if it is a good restaurant, I expect my glass to be tall, and so crammed with ice that my ice water is an enjoyable escape that makes me feel like I am on vacation.

Water Glass Crap
What I Get

Sadly, the water served far too many restaurants today is not ice water, but instead something that looks like a lukewarm foot-bath in which someone mistakenly dropped a couple ice cubes. And to make matter worse, these idiots pour lukewarm water into the glass first and then plop a couple ice cubes on top of it. It reminds one of a dead carp floating in a pond.

Restaurants spend millions of dollars on perfecting cocktails so that they look appetizing. Do you think it is too much to ask for these people to pay some respect to ice, water and the clientele who love both? I made a couple glasses of ice water. You tell me which one you would rather drink.



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